Two guys are sitting in a bar.
First one says: "So there's this problem between me and my wife, whenever I come home after a night of drinking and get in bed, my wife wakes up really pissed and sends me to the couch!"
Other guy says: "Yeah, happened to me before, but I figured that instead of trying to not make any noise, I just had to give her a bit of lovin' and she'd shut right up! Worked everytime for me."
"Great advice! I'm gonna try that out!"
So that night, the first guy comes back home piss-drunk again. He crawls upstairs, heads to his room and decides to try what his buddy says. He slowly slinks to bed and silently gets to work on the woman. He finishes, and he's happy to notice that she doesn't say a word! He gets out of bed to have a quick leak. In the bathroom, he stumbles, surprisingly, upon his wife.
She has a really pissed-off look on her face: "What're you doing home at this hour!?"
He then responds, visibly baffled: "What!? W-weren't you just..."
"Quiet!" she utters in a hoarse whisper. "Mom's sleeping in our room, don't wake her up!"