A rich man was hosting a party at his mansion, but was sick of his wealth and decided to give it away. He filled his swimming pool with alligators and piranhas and didn't feed them for days.
When the party gathered, he announced to the guests: "Whoever jumps into this pool and comes out alive can have all of my cigars!"
No one jumped.
"Anyone who jumps in can have all of my cigars, and all of my cars!"
Still no one jumped.
Undeterred, the man said, "Anyone who jumps in can have my cigars, my cars, and my mansion for free!"
He heard a yell and a splash. He looked into the pool and saw a man fighting the alligators, using kung fu moves and judo to fend them off. After several terrifying minutes of the fight, the man killed the last alligator and jumped out.
"Amazing!" the host said, "When do you want my house?"
"I don't want your house" the man said.
"Okay, then when do you want my cars?"
"I don't want your cars" the man replied.
"Well, then, when do you want my cigars?"
"I don't want your cigars" the man muttered.
"You just jumped into a pool and fought alligators! And you want nothing?"
"You're right, I do want something!"
"Well, what is it then?"
The man scanned the crowd: "I want that bastard that pushed me in!"